Lost and Sinking, But Not Anymore
by ninjasandbacon
Summary: It wasn't the way she gazed at him, admiration shining in her eyes.It wasn't how she would always prove him wrong and take on his challenges.It wasn't how she was perfect. Rather, it was her imperfections that attracted him the most.Chuck x Blair.Drabble-


It wasn't the way she gazed at him, admiration shining in her eyes. It wasn't how she would always prove him wrong and take on his challenges. It wasn't how she was perfect. Rather, it was her imperfections that attracted him the most. When he looked at her, he didn't see the perfect shell everyone else did, the shell she prided herself on having. He saw the tears, the hardship, the feeling of always being second best to the world. He not only loved all of that, he admired the way she lived through it. He would watch as she gave her love and soul to a man who could never return the same kind of love. He never intervened, knowing that if he did, she would mock him for years to come. All he could do was hope that she would come to her senses and realize what was a fantasy and what was real.

When his hopes had become a reality, he was elated. Not that he'd admit it, of course. He would no longer admire and love her from afar, he could have her. He could show her that her perfect plan for life wasn't meant to be reality, and sometimes the unexpected things are the most wonderful things to ever happen. He could tell her how much he loved her, how much he cherished her. He could, but he never got the opportunity to. In a moment of weakness spurned by his father's speech, he had lost her. But he could regain her. He had lost her during his drunken declaration, but had regained her at the wedding with his best man speech. He would steal her heart once again. He would prove to her that he wasn't the failure everyone believed him to be. He had nothing left to lose. However, he knew that if he lost her once more, he would never get her back.

When he had once again regained her during summer, everything had changed. He became happier, he drank less, and for once in his life, he was determined to get into an Ivy League school, preferably Yale. She was his once more. She still gave him butterflies and he wasn't ashamed to admit it. They no longer cared what everyone said about them, knowing that their love for each other could conquer all. They would sit on the steps, waiting for their best friends and their partners to arrive. The bubbly blonde that was _her _best friend and the broody stoner that was_ his_ best friend. It became a daily ritual. One they would always remember, a memory that would be cherished no matter how old they got to be. Because they were happy.

When he found out about her early acceptance to Yale, he merely put on a happy face for her and the rest of the world. The moment he saw the letter, he was distraught. There was no way he got into Yale. He had good grades, but he never did anything to make Yale even glance at his application. She had years and years of volunteer work and extracurriculars while he had none. Absolutely none. Some nights, he would sit at the bar and stare into the mirror that hung above, hoping that somehow he got into Yale. He knew he would break if she left him. Without her around, he would resort to what he had done after his father's speech.

She had come over, ready for their date only to find him clutching an envelope from Yale. Discarding any thought of their night out, she slid next to him, to find that it hasn't been open. She glanced at him nervously. He nodded once before closing his eyes and burying his head in her shoulder. She slit the envelope open and took out the crisp sheet of paper. She scanned through it quickly and was unable to form words. He looked up from her shoulder, with a sinking feeling. He closed his eyes once more and took the paper from her. He had failed her. Wrenching his eyes open, he looked at the paper. It was a miracle. He got in. For once in his life, he managed to do his father proud.

Before him, she was with a guy who didn't love her. Before her, he was with every girl possible. But now, they have each other. He was lost, but now he's found. She was sinking, but now she's afloat. Right now, all that mattered was that they had each other.


End file.
